Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aw8NW7bQXJg Starts at: 01:28:00 (jump to 01:28:00)
Patrick Finn – Personal Story on Faith, Identity, and Mental Health
[01:28:00] Ooh, and with more time to spare. [01:28:03] Prayer? [01:28:04] Yes. [01:28:04] Prayer? [01:28:05] Yeah. [01:28:09] Yeah, like snap it. [01:28:11] Like, like just jam it? [01:28:13] Yeah. [01:28:15] Damn right. [01:28:17] Exactly. [01:28:20] I’m smart. [01:28:20] I got a Masters Degree. [01:28:22] I swear. [01:28:23] I swear. [01:28:24] Actually, I’m a licensed clinical social worker and do provide therapy at an agency that I’m [01:28:28] not affiliated with to-night’s. [01:28:30] Because I’m here with NAMI. [01:28:32] But guess who gave you guys some fans? [01:28:35] Brexton health care shameless plug time so we are introducing a NAMI [01:28:44] participants yes but before that I’d like to remind you guys that we have a [01:28:51] raffle for multiple items for goodies on this side here raffle tickets are two [01:28:57] four five and five twenty four ten and for the folks that did pre-purchase [01:29:06] their tickets they get a chance to win target gift card Walmart gift card and [01:29:11] our my specially crafted wellness gift card which contains a whole food gift [01:29:16] card in there as well so if you pre-purchase your tickets I need to see [01:29:20] that proof thank you but coming to the stage is Patrick Finn [01:29:26] give it up for Patrick Finn [01:29:27] how much time do I got five minutes I’m gonna pause for a second [01:29:57] thank you [01:30:14] thank you [01:30:17] thank you [01:30:25] I love you guys so much [01:30:27] bipolar one with psychotic features, PTSD, and overcome eating disorder, and I’m a mess. [01:30:36] I started my life in a fine home, and I wasn’t raised a Christian, [01:30:46] but I found Christianity when I was 16. [01:30:50] It was amazing. [01:30:53] And then my mom died in my arms. [01:30:58] I found to strive into the Lord more and more, but the world got in the way. [01:31:04] The world wanted to let me know what it was. [01:31:07] I got on fire, and I fell back in, one foot in, one foot out. [01:31:13] And then I started to fall more. [01:31:16] I have over 1,000 scars on my body. [01:31:19] One time I would like to broke my leg with a hammer. [01:31:22] I lost myself. [01:31:24] I had no idea who I was, of what I wanted to be in this world, [01:31:27] so I tried to create. [01:31:28] I tried to create all the different vices for what I was supposed to do. [01:31:32] And by 2015, I found it. [01:31:37] Everything clicked. [01:31:39] I found out that I was transgender. [01:31:43] Everything clicked. [01:31:44] I realized who this person was, and this was seven years of my life. [01:31:51] Two suicide attempts for hospital inhabitants. [01:31:58] My hand was handcuffed twice. [01:32:02] This is who I am. [01:32:03] Then COVID came around, and I was like, I’m gonna be me, me. [01:32:09] For three days straight. [01:32:10] No one’s around. [01:32:11] I’m homebound. [01:32:12] I’m supposed to be here. [01:32:16] Man, I was gorgeous. [01:32:19] I knew my way around makeup. [01:32:21] I knew everything about it. [01:32:24] And I was, you know… [01:32:25] And I would lean down to pick something up, [01:32:26] this is not what I want for you and my heart sank I was like no that can’t be [01:32:33] true that’s not true no so I went away from that for a while for two years I [01:32:38] was half one foot in one foot out and then I read a book I was on the floor I [01:32:44] felt it was on the ground I didn’t know why I was there but I picked it up and [01:32:48] in that book was this I know your works you’re neither hot nor cold would you [01:32:56] were neither so because you’re a lukewarm and either hot or cold I will [01:33:00] spit you out of my mouth and it floored me [01:33:11] I said you are everything so I gave and I said my life is over it’s not about me [01:33:21] it’s never been it’s never been I took everything [01:33:26] out even an earring I was praising and I put my hands through my hair and I [01:33:31] said what’s this and the Lord said what if you got rid of that too and I said [01:33:35] why people know me by that it’s an arrow and he said do they know me by that take [01:33:39] it it’s not about me then one day when I was at work I messed up a project and I [01:33:45] said I’ve never been good at this job I should go tell my boss he should find [01:33:51] somebody better than me so I went around I’m like you know what I should just go hang myself in the air and I’ll be good [01:33:55] myself and then at that last time I heard in my brain it said [01:33:58] praise my name now. And I dropped my [01:34:03] arms and I said praise the Lord Jesus. [01:34:07] And everything left. All those fears. Everything left. Because it’s [01:34:11] never been about me. Because by sacrificing everything about who I was [01:34:15] I became eternal. [01:34:20] It’s never been about me. I’m not [01:34:23] determined by my own circumstance or what a day can do to me or by somebody [01:34:27] cutting me off in traffic. Somebody cuts me off and I say oh they know who they are. [01:34:30] They should just like, somebody should arrest them. No. That’s entitlement. [01:34:36] Lord bless that person. May they experience [01:34:38] love in such an amazing way that they know your truth [01:34:42] and your love. [01:34:46] I’m here to speak my truth but I’m here to speak that he is the way. He is the [01:34:50] truth. He is the life. Thank you. [01:34:53] That was emotional.