Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4RysJspGE4 Starts at: 00:57:59 (jump to 00:57:59)
Carter Flay — Spoken Word on Schizophrenia and Belief
[00:57:59] Lyrics from Kingfish say, yo, one line, so, fish, yo, what’s good? [00:58:05] Yo, Beck, yo. [00:58:06] Yo, Beck, everybody say yo to Kingfish. [00:58:08] Yo! [00:58:10] Hey, there we go, there we go. So, keep it going. [00:58:15] How do you say the last name? [00:58:18] Flay? [00:58:19] I’m going to try, we’re going to go, we’re going to go, we should ask, we should ask. [00:58:22] Vance, Vance. [00:58:23] All right, coming to the stage, I want y’all to give it up for Carter Flay. [00:58:28] Carter! [00:58:30] We said that right? I said that right? [00:58:32] Yeah! [00:58:36] Thank you. [00:58:42] Props to y’all doing it off the top of your head, I got a piece of paper. [00:58:48] First, I’d like to thank Nami for doing this, and I’d like to thank my mom for really advocating for me, and putting Nami on my radar. [00:58:59] Yeah. [00:59:02] Mom’s a rock. [00:59:03] Mom’s a fucking rock. [00:59:05] All right, here we go. [00:59:06] So, I was playing a game with some friends a while back, as like a little get-together. [00:59:12] It was like, most likely to, that’s what the game was called. [00:59:15] And the premise of the game is like, who’s most likely to be rich one day? [00:59:22] And it’s go three, two, one, and you point at the person who you think is going to be rich one day, or whatever the most likely. [00:59:29] So, one of the prompts was, who’s most likely to be a cult leader? [00:59:40] And I was like, all right, that guy over there. [00:59:44] Three, two, one, ha! [00:59:46] And everybody pointed right at me. [00:59:50] I took it as a compliment, to be honest. [00:59:53] A leader. [00:59:57] With beliefs different than the mainstream. [00:59:59] But, in the end, perhaps my friends could sense that my reality was just a little bit different than theirs. [01:00:08] A few years later, I’d be diagnosed with schizophrenia. [01:00:11] These days, I have to do a lot of check-ins with myself and those close to me. [01:00:18] I have to make sure that my decisions come from a place of reason, with only dabbles of intuition and self-belief. [01:00:25] So, I figured I’d use the… [01:00:29] Was it speak? [01:00:29] …pure truth to speak some of my truths and share some beliefs of mine. [01:00:37] And, yeah, feel free to take them with a grain of salt, or as serious as you’d like. [01:00:41] I believe, above all things, that the cosmos, the universe, God, whatever you want to call it, is inherently good. [01:00:51] I’m sure I see God as a wiser version of myself, who oversees my path and gives me blessings and challenges [01:00:59] to encourage myself. [01:00:59] I believe in my development. [01:01:02] I believe in myself. [01:01:08] I believe that I’m beautiful and intelligent and sensitive and gentle and have a wondrous heart. [01:01:14] I believe that I came to Earth to do cool stuff and have lots of fun. [01:01:20] Here we go. [01:01:21] I believe it’d be interesting, maybe one day, to tattoo myself a completely different color. [01:01:27] Blue or green, or purple, or maybe orange, I don’t know. [01:01:29] blue or green, or purple, or maybe orange, I don’t know. 29 00-00-02-2038 [01:01:29] blue or green, or purple, or maybe orange, I don’t know. 29 00-00-02-2038?, 29 00-00-02-2014 [01:01:29] I believe this is one life of many [01:01:33] Which has led me to embrace the motto of [01:01:36] Send it [01:01:37] Don’t worry, I haven’t committed to this idea quite yet [01:01:41] I believe that anything is possible [01:01:44] Like literally, literally anything [01:01:47] I believe if people bare their souls to each other fully [01:01:51] We can communicate without speaking [01:01:54] I believe if we train our minds and stuff [01:01:59] We can levitate and like teleport [01:02:01] And live for centuries upon centuries [01:02:04] If you haven’t read the book Autobiography of a Yogi [01:02:07] That was a good one, it kind of blew my mind [01:02:10] I believe the future is free food, water, shelter [01:02:14] Healthcare, education, etc [01:02:16] I believe if these ingredients of life are no longer scarce [01:02:22] Humanity would be much closer to a peaceful coexistence [01:02:26] Michael Scott from The Office once said [01:02:29] I believe if we can levitate and teleport [01:02:29] It goes to show that everything in life you want, you get [01:02:33] And you can’t work for it, it just comes to you [01:02:37] I like to believe him [01:02:39] So yeah, my imagination swells [01:02:46] And my beliefs are inclusive [01:02:48] I dream, I dream, and I dream [01:02:51] And yeah, sometimes I like post a lot of these things like online [01:02:57] Which, yeah, some people are more appreciative than others [01:03:02] And yeah, so I usually give like a PSA [01:03:08] Like if you think I need to like check myself with any of these beliefs [01:03:11] Please don’t hesitate to tell me [01:03:13] You can take what I say with a grain of salt [01:03:18] You can call me on my BS [01:03:19] You can worry about me [01:03:21] Or you can have faith that my journey is being carefully and lovingly overlooked [01:03:26] By the people around me [01:03:27] Something else [01:03:28] Or do some of both [01:03:30] Another quote that I vibe with is [01:03:33] Faith or fear, choose one [01:03:35] Yeah, I believe this existence is magical and playful [01:03:40] I believe we are the oneness playing peekaboo with itself [01:03:43] And every once in a while [01:03:45] We’ll catch glimpses of the boundless potential life has to offer [01:03:48] Thanks for being with me on this ride [01:03:50] Thank you